Well, here we are.
We made it.
People have FEELINGS about the end of the year, don’t they? They either come in hot or don’t come in at all. I’m not ashamed to admit that I love a tabula rasa more than the average person, and while I have never believed the new calendar year has cornered the market on fresh starts- I take one every chance I get. January is no different.
I have always taken the time to review what big things happened in my own life (I qualify them as big, even if they might not register that way on your end), what gave me joy, what gave me pause, what made me think, what inspired me- and how I wish for 2024 to go (that’s for the next installment).
It’s all very fluid, as we know 2024 will go how every year does. Parts of it will be beautiful and parts of it will suck and sometimes it will be both at the same time which is really confusing even still, but true nonetheless. So, here they are. The things that made 2023 what it was. And a happy new year to all.
The BEST of 2023
After freelancing as a copywriter/content developer/editor for about two years, I landed a full-time remote position for a company I adore in April. I streamlined most of my freelance work into the Ed Tech/Product/Curriculum Development/SEL space and am thrilled to be able to continue to use my experience, my education, and my background in this new role. I love the mission we’re on to ensure every adult in a school setting has the skills to self-regulate. I believe it’s good work, and I’m grateful to be a part of it. ( Yes, I’m still freelancing, but have scaled WAAAYYYYY back).
We went to Orlando as a family in July. Harry Potter World at Universal was a core memory I will never forget- Epcot was less exciting but still beautiful.
My sister and her family moved back to NJ!!!! Half of my heart was missing and now to know I can just drive under an hour to see her has literally lifted ages off of my body.
We won the Hamilton lottery!!!!! El and I went and it just as glorious as I imagined.
I went to therapy. Like, for real. Like, once a week. And after almost a full year I can tell you for certain exactly nothing except: we’re way more fucked up than we think we are, and we can’t dig out of old habits, patterns, and ways of thinking alone. No, I have still not met my inner-child willingly. Yes, I might be in therapy forever. Maybe we all should be. What I HAVE been able to do is take baby steps toward becoming the woman I want to be, as opposed to the one others expect. It has been terrifying and freeing and I wouldn’t trade it. Also- if you have tried therapy and it wasn’t for you, that might be true. AND. You might not have met the right person. Your mental health is worth the effort it takes to find a good fit.
I invested in good skin care and stuck with it. Do I put snail excrement on my face? Yes. Yes, I do. Do I spend over 100.00 on a little pot full of unidentifiable blue goo? You bet. Will I keep doing it? As long as it works as magically as it has, yes.
My husband fixated on the day I said one sentence aloud: “I think I want to be a pajama set person” and has since purchased a wide variety of them for me. It is sooooooo re-setting to take a night shower and put on a beautiful, matching set of pajamas. I feel like Mrs. Maisel.
I stopped buying books and started frequenting the library. It’s not a surprise to any of you that I love the library- but I also was quick to the draw with the Amazon cart. I promised myself in 2023 that I would only spend money on books that make a deep impact, and borrow the rest. It’s become my Sunday afternoon practice to update my “request” list on my library account online, and then pick them up on Monday mornings after the school drop off.
I began to let myself off the hook this year in a way I never had before. We ate more cereal for dinner than ever. We might have worn jeans a few times in a row before washing them. No one suffered. More of this.
The Not-So-Good
I broke my finger in September (technically, I spiral-fractured my ring finger, re-injured three broken knuckles that I was unaware were previously broken that year, and tore some tendons and ligaments) and to say the healing process has been slow would be the understatement of the century. I did NOT have surgery, though the longer it takes to heal the more likely that prospect is possible. It has slowed me down and broken me in ways I can’t even explain. It almost feels dumb to say that- it’s just a hand, right? It’s not even my dominant one. But I have struggled just as much mentally as I have physically with this injury and it’s really forced me to look at how I view my own body, healing, autonomy, healthcare, and advocacy. It has, however, really opened the doors to all avenues of healing (bodywork, reiki, eastern medicine, etc.) for which I am grateful
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We have dealt with mental health as a family in ways I had hoped might pass us over and while those details are private, it has taken a toll on our nuclear family. We are entering into 2024 tired.
The cost of living increased for all of us this year, and it felt like we just couldn’t get a break. Groceries are a million dollars. Both kids have expensive extracurriculars. It costs close to 1000.00 a month to heat our 200-year-old home with oil. Even with freelance projects on the side (me) and overtime for months on end (him), we still struggled. We’re not alone- it’s most of our stories.
2023 was beautiful and sacred and a shitshow. But I feel like I’m slowly, steadily walking toward something good in 2024. I can’t wait to tell you what I hope it’ll hold.
I will walk beside you through 2024 just as we have walked through the shit show of 2023 together. I'm so very grateful for your friendship and your love and wisdom in my life. 💕