On Being New, Shame in the Dark and Gold Standards
I witnessed an internet thread interaction this week that left me spinning a bit.
Ordinarily, for better or worse, I’m fairly immune to the tomfoolery that is a comment thread. I think we’ve all witnessed the loss of humanity when people speak with their fingers behind screens as opposed to having real, nuanced conversations in person and it leaves some of us whose jobs kind of land us here in this internet world wondering if it’s possible to create a positive community. In short- it is. Possible. But it’s also very, very difficult. I’m almost always able to hold the tension, but because I read it on a platform that I’ve been published quite frequently on, it stayed with me. Long enough to address it here.
In short, there was an illustration attached to a beautifully written article about Motherhood. But no one was talking about the article, unfortunately. The vast majority, it seemed, was more fixated on the fact that the mother in the illustration had clearly displayed armpit hair. Seriously. The comments were full of, what were meant to be humorous, but actually insensitive language speculating on why this mother would have, essentially, let herself go. If ever a simple phrase was to be considered my nemesis, this would be the one.
It was one of the few times I was very tempted to jump in the fray. But I didn’t. Because the problem, really, isn’t a bunch of well-meaning but judgmental comments. It’s so much deeper than that. It’s that there are some of us who still believe that whatever we ascribe to/believe is the right and only way.
Full stop.
There’s nothing else to say.
What’s Giving Me Life This Week
I had the incredible privilege to have been a guest on a podcast that aired this week. I hadn’t anticipated the kind of positive feedback I received and was truly honored that so many of you listened. Faith journeys are sometimes so difficult to articulate-but it was such a blessing to hear from so many of you who are on similar paths. Thank you for reaching out to me! If you missed it, you can still listen here.
Shauna Niequist has been an author I’ve admired for about a decade. Her newest book, “I Guess I Haven’t Learned That Yet” came out this week and I’ve been unable to put it down. The way Shauna weaves her own personal stories with faith, food and larger themes that connect us all is, I think, the best recipe for a memoir. If you’ve found yourself making big changes in your late 30’s early 40’s, have a love affair with New York City (like I do), and are aching from the newness of navigating a new season in life, it might be worth a read.
Glennon Doyle’s podcast fits in my regular rotation, but if I’m honest, I haven’t loved the last few episodes. So, I didn’t have high hopes about her most recent one with Jen Hatmaker. I was wrong. I wrote a little about it here.
Live music gives my husband and I life and we were committed to adding in more of it this year as things began to open back up. So far we’ve seen Brandi Carlile at Carnegie Hall and Joe Purdey at Levon Helm Studios in Woodstock. I’m really looking forward to seeing Joy Oladokun at the Bowery in May. What haven’t you done in a while that you want to bring back in to your life?
I haven’t been in the kitchen much this past week, but that’s because I’ve been working on two, food related pieces that I think you’ll love that I’ll release here in the next two weeks. So, stay tuned for my restaurant list for date nights in the Morris/Hunterdon/Sussex County areas, and my guide on how we navigate eating out with kids- especially picky ones. :)
Whatever your weekend is full of, I hope you find some time to connect with the people you love, sing at the top of your lungs, get lost in a story and eat something delicious.
What else is there, really?